Belly Up Fantasy Sports has plenty of experts to help you make your team the best it can be. These guys work tirelessly to crunch numbers, evaluate matchups, and find data that will give you an edge. They also have an editor who thinks Chase Edmonds is going to run him to a Championship this year. Once the experts get your lineup set, come check out the Taco Perspective from BUFS’ resident idiot.

When people kept telling me I had to stay six feet away because they didn’t want me to give them a disease, I immediately ran to Twitter to see if my medical records had been leaked. Not that I have any kind of itching or burning issues or anything. Apparently, they are talking about some kind of flu though? I’m not sure, I haven’t left my house since February because I got my toe stuck in a hole in the wall trying to dig out a Cheez-It that fell.

Anyway, the NFL looked at how the NBA and MLB were handling playing sports during a virus and said, “let’s do what baseball is doing.” It seemed to be working out super well for a week or two, but now the thing is spreading like crazy. It’s hard enough to track all these football players, and now games are being postponed and canceled. I don’t know how you people keep up, do you not have seven private businesses to run?

Hey, I Made a Trade!

I pulled off a trade this week, and one of the players I sent out was Allen Lazard. 10 hours later, he was diagnosed with eternal bleeding. I hope it didn’t have anything to do with the bottle of three penis wine I sent him as a thank you for his great game. Either way, the biggest piece I got in return was Noah Fant, who fell victim to the most dangerous ailment out there this season in the NFL: the MetLife Stadium turf. Hopefully he will be back before I have to figure out another guy who plays tight end. Is Gary Barnidge still catching balls with his butt somewhere? Wait, don’t answer that, I don’t want to know.

COVID from the Taco Perspective

COVID claimed an entire game this week, and Cam Newtown. Cam is a major bummer. Not because he’s on my fantasy team, I just like his haircut. Here’s hoping he can make a quick recovery. Some good old fashioned rest and relaxation should help. Maybe Robert Kraft can recommend a good place for that. Seems like a guy who really likes to relax. The only player off of my roster is Chase Claypool, who I grabbed off waivers because I thought he was Les Claypool. Man, that guy can slap a bass better than Ben Roethlisberger can slap a locked bathroom door. I am sure that’s how he is spending his time off. Let’s just hope whether he’s in a ladies’ room or on a motorcycle he’s wearing a helmet, for everyone’s sake.

Follow me on Twitter @KyePSports and check back next week to see the next Taco Perspective, and find out if any more players were caught drinking Corona on their days off. If you get bored waiting, head over to Manscaped and grab one of their packages for 20% off with code BELLYUPFANTASY. This way no one gets rugburn when they grab your package.